We fade in with snap-shot images recapping the final moments of this past Sunday’s Royal Rumble main event when the pay-per-view emanated from Montreal. Barrett tries to counter and he lifts him (John Cena) atop his shoulders for a possible WasteLand – but no, Cena drops off his shoulders, counters, lifts Barrett and “Aaahhhh!” yell the comms as The Doctor lays out Barrett with an FU! Cena then picks Barrett up and throws him over the top rope! John Cena’s going to WrestleMania!
We come Live into the Colisee Pepsi here in the French regions of Canada and the fans scream as we hear ♫John Cena’s music♫ «< click to play). The Doctor of Thuganomics is slow to make his way out to the stage and he gets the fans going as he salutes them before running down to the ring. Jim Ross excitedly brings us into the show and he says that John Cena has really grown on the fans. William Regal, JR’s co-commentator, is not in the best of moods though. He says that Wade Barrett had legitimately thought he had won the Rumble match: “What that opening clip didn’t show you is the part where Wade Barrett won. Wade had sent Cena over the top rope and while Cena clung onto it, the man’s feet touched the floor. Wade should be the one in that ring celebrating right now.” Cena is handed a microphone and he smiles as he looks out toward the fans. Calmly he says: “It’s been a long time since I heard a cheer like that. Thanks Quebec.” The fans cheer more and Regal besmirches: “Pathetic.” Cena says that it took a long time for him to be legit. He explains that in the KWF he’s always had to cope with the very top level of opposition, and on the way, he’s chosen to take the easy way out. “Whether it was Title defenses, grudge matches or main events, I figured I’d save my own skin and get away with whatever I could to ensure that I had the best result for me. But you know what? Edge took over and I couldn’t exactly run things the way I did before. I had to compete fairly to win. Little did I know that come Royal Rumble 2013, I’d be the one throwing over 29 other men and I’d be the one going to Mania – because of all of you.” The fans cheer even louder as Cena says that it was the fans encouragement that gave him the extra strength, the extra will and desire to win the Rumble match. He thanks them for their support and promises to go to Mania, give everything he has and become the KWF Champion once again. Cena’s cheered perhaps even louder than he was cheered on Sunday, but then boos ring around the arena as we hear ♫the music of Wade Barrett♫ «< click to play). Barrett looks furious when he enters the ring and immediately he discloses his argument. He tells Cena that he threw him out of the Rumble match and that he should be the one going to WrestleMania. Regal: “Here here.” The fans boo, but Barrett angrily says: “Oh shut up you whiney bunch of sheep. Get out of Canada, go back to France and then take a ferry to England. Get a real education and you’ll realize that I am the biggest thing in the business right now.” The fans boo more as Barrett addresses Cena: “John, after Sunday people aren’t talking about you as much as you think. People are talking about the absolute travesty that occurred when the bloody zebras at ringside couldn’t agree whether your feet hit the ground or not.” Barrett turns our attention to the tron and he shows us a snapshot image apparently showing that both Cena’s feet hit the ground when Barrett thought he had eliminated him. Cena argues back though and he asks the production crew to show that very image, but the incident from another angle and as we see it, it appears that only one of Cena’s feet touch the ground.
Cena says: “The first angle was just the shadow of my foot and it’s a good job the ref on the other side didn’t agree with the first ref because then I’d be the one out here spoiling your party and saying that my feet didn’t touch the floor. But that’s not the situation here Barrett and what you have to accept my friend is that the correct call was made. The match went on, and you were eliminated. The man that’s going to WrestleMania is John Cena!” The crowd cheer as Barrett states that “these ignorant fans” have bought into Cena’s hype and now suddenly he’s their hero. “Look at yourself John. I thought you were more of a man than that. I thought I could come out here, plead my case and as a man you would admit that your feet touched the floor. Haha, 29 other men you say, 29 other men that you eliminated? What a joke. You’re pathetic John and while” – Barrett is interrupted as we hear ♫You think you know me♫ «< click to play). Smoke pours onto the stage as the tron rises and out comes KWF’s General Manager, The Rated R GM Edge! Edge comes down to the ring and grabs a mic. Barrett tries to speak, but Edge tells him that he’s not here for a hearing because he’s seen the Rumble again and he’s taking into consideration what happened. He says: “But first of all. (He puts his hand out to Cena) Congratulations John, for winning the Royal Rumble match.” The fans cheer as Cena shakes Edge’s hand. Barrett yells in Edge’s direction and says: “You just said you’re taking everything into consideration! What are you going to do for me Edge? I won that match!” Edge ignores Barrett for the moment and says that he has two announcements to make regarding John Cena, the reigning KWF World Champion AJ Styles, and WrestleMania. Cena, Barrett and the fans listen intently as Edge says that there will be an Elimination Chamber match at SuperBrawl: “Six KWF superstars will compete and the winner will go on to join the WrestleMania main event to make it a Triple Threat match for the KWF World Heavyweight Championship!” John Cena raises his eyebrows, but doesn’t respond with anything other than a ‘well I’ll be damned’ smile. He nods at the decision, but Barrett continues to go berserk: “Chamber? You’re going to put me in a Chamber match just to get to Mania?! I should already be there Edge! If you want a Triple Threat at Mania, put me in the match! I earned it!” Edge tells Barrett to calm down and he says that Barrett in fact won’t be in the Chamber match at all: “There’ll be qualifiers between twelve superstars and six of them will go into the Chamber. But Wade, you have to give me a chance here. I know what happened at the Rumble alright and I will make things right for you. You just have to be a little bit patient. But in the meantime, on to my second announcement, ladies and gentlemen how’d you like to see John Cena versus Wade Barrett Live here tonight?” The fans cheer as Edge says that it’s settled and Cena vs. Barrett will be Turmoil’s main event. Edge exits as Barrett still complains to him off-mic. Cena stands in the corner, still with the same smile glued to his face as when he heard the announcement of WrestleMania’s Triple Threat. Regal chuckles: “Haha, he doesn’t like this does he?” JR: “Well William considering the circumstances by which Brock Lesnar was re-hired to this company, and considering that John Cena has only just gotten the biggest cheer he’s ever had in the KWF, I’m wondering if there’s an underlying motive here from Edge. As it stands, it would be Cena versus Styles at Mania, but Edge wants a Triple Threat? This seems quite unfair on Cena and on AJ Styles, but for the fans, this is huge!” Regal shakes his head: “It is huge and unfortunately, it’s all about the fans and all about ratings to our GM. He’s already made a blockbuster number one contender’s match for SuperBrawl and in the meantime, we now have to wonder what’s going through the heads of Cena and Styles. And Wade Barrett by the way. I hope Edge gives him something. Wade should be going to Mania for sure.”
Back Live from commercials we see that one half of the World Tag Team Champions, Gambit, has made his entrance along with Kelly Kelly. The audience cheer him as Regal besmirches over the circumstances by which Gambit and Jeff ‘The Joker’ Hardy retained their Titles this past Sunday at Royal Rumble: “All five of that clan were all over Kaz and Daniels, even if the ref had eyes in the back of his head he wouldn’t have seen their shenanigans.” JR: “Yes well in part I think that’s why this match here has come about William. Gambit literally stomped in Kaz’s nether-regions, behind the ref’s back, but Edge has seen fit to punish the Cajun with a match against one of KWF’s top superstars here tonight, our Intercontinental Champion, The Viper Randy Orton!” ♫Orton’s music hits♫ «< click to play) and the fans cheer louder for him than they did for Gambit. He slithers into the ring and we see K2 peck Gambit on the cheek before exiting to ringside.
Gambit w/ Kelly Kelly vs. Randy Orton
The comms note that Gambit’s got that HBK-style spring back in his step after having ‘taken care’ of Kaz’s advances toward Kelly Kelly. He locks up with Orton and we’re reminded of how Orton was one of the final four this past Sunday in the Royal Rumble match. JR: “He’s the KWF’s Apex Predator. A man who takes every match as it comes and he’s always out to win William. The desire he has to compete and get the Three-count can perhaps only be topped by one person in the KWF – and that’s our World Champion, the Phenomenal AJ Styles.” Regal: “Yes but he didn’t exactly win the Rumble match. He’s got that IC strap though and I must say, it’s hard to see anyone taking it from him.” Orton’s backed up Gambit toward the corner and gotten on top early on. He tries to unload punches, but Gambit is smart to put his torso between the top and middle rope to get the referee to pull Orton away. Orton backs off toward the middle of the ring and Gambit decides to lay across the top rope. He smiles toward Orton, taunting him to bring it, but as Orton attacks, Gambit rolls over the back of him and rolls Orton down to his shoulders. One-count, Two-count, but Orton kicks out. Gambit backs off and takes a bow as the fans laugh and applaud. JR: “That was Randy Orton’s own move folks, and Gambit’s playing a head-game early here.” The contest goes on and we watch what turns out to be an excellent match to open Turmoil. The comms remind us that Orton and Gambit have wrestled before, back on KWF’s old Impact SmackDown. Regal: “Back then it was a main event, but now KWF’s at an even higher level where these two Champions open up the show. I don’t agree with Edge half the time, but kudos to him. He’s made KWF must-read each and every week – and we thank you all for being with us.” The match goes back and forth as Orton hits his inverted headlock backbreaker. He covers for One, Two – but Gambit kicks out. Orton gets up and tries to get Gambit to his feet. He gets him into suplex position and the crowd cheer as he lifts him for a delayed version of the move. JR: “Incredible strength, and Gambit’s no lightweight.” That works in Gambit’s favor as he kicks his legs so that Orton is force to lower him forward. Gambit lands on his feet, counters The Viper and pulls him in, clutches his arms and *BAM* Double Arm DDT! A great counter and now Gambit covers for One, Two – but Orton kicks out! Gambit gets up and backs off toward the corner. He looks like he’s setting for Mardi-Gras. Orton eventually gets to his feet and Gambit approaches – but Orton ducks and *BAM* RKO from The Viper! Perfectly timed and if the Double Arm was impressive, then the RKO tops it! An outstanding show of resilience and an example of Orton’s desire to win. He shoots the half, hooks the leg and Gambit’s out for the Three-count.
Winner: Randy Orton.
♫Orton’s music hits♫ «< click to play) and the audience applaud the efforts of both Champions in our opening bout. The referee hands Orton his Intercontinental Title, but then we hear ♫Why So Serious’ music♫ «< click to play). Orton looks around, expecting an attack. He sees Kelly Kelly enter the ring, but she goes and tends to Gambit. The tron rises and we see Why So Serious leader Jeff ‘The Joker’ Hardy. He’s joined by Christy ‘Harley Quinn’ Hemme and The Monster Abyss. However, they don’t make moves toward the ring. Their music stops and they simply stand on stage and applaud Randy Orton. The Joker even waves his hands to the fans and gets them to cheer louder for Orton’s victory. Christy Hemme brings out pom-poms, out of nowhere, and she begins an RKO chant. Orton looks puzzled as he turns his head back toward Gambit and while Gambit has his head in K2’s lap, the Cajun looks at Orton and smiles at him before giving him a thumbs-up. The comms wonder what’s going on here and then we see The Joker, Abyss and Harley make their way down the ramp as Gambit gets to his feet and Kelly hands him his Tag Team Title. Orton though is quick to get out of the ring and he keeps an eye on all five of Why So Serious to make sure they’re nowhere near him as they gather in the ring. Orton treads softly around them to finally exit up the ramp. JR: “That was bizarre. But Randy Orton’s famously seen a thumbs-up back in his Evolution days, and we all remember what happened there. Maybe Why So Serious were trying to lull him into a false sense of security here William?” Regal: “Yeah probably, but it’s five on one so if they really wanted to, I suppose they could’ve hunted him down to batter him. They’re so bloody weird though. Freaks.”
We go to a video clip showing us what happened after Jack Evans defeated Rey Mysterio this past Sunday. We see him celebrating his first ever KWF X-Division Title victory on the night, and as he went backstage after the match, a number of his X-Division colleagues were standing by to congratulate him on his achievement. A voiceover from Evans says: “I couldn’t believe it. Last year ended so badly after getting screwed over at Starrcade. But without Konnan at ringside, I had Mysterio one-on-one and what a match it was. I defeated him. I defeated Rey Mysterio and now I’m responsible for taking the X-Division to new heights. Wow, what a feeling.” We fade to a snap-shot recap of what happened this past Sunday at KWF Royal Rumble. There were six matches on the night, beginning with Jack Evans defeating Rey Mysterio to become the new KWF X-Division Champion. We saw Gambit and The Joker retain their Tag Titles against Kaz and Daniels. Sheamus lost his Hardcore Championship to Alberto Del Rio and the new Latin American eXchange. It was revealed that Kaitlyn was attacked backstage, foiling any plan from the Chickbusters to overcome the Women’s Rumble match. The Beautiful People were responsible and a bad night turned worse for AJ Lee as she lost her Title to Angelina Love. AJ Styles defeated Brock Lesnar against all the odds to retain his World Title and of course, John Cena overcame 29 other men to win the Royal Rumble match – a contest where we saw the return of Kane, and the Big Red Monster famously re-aligned with his brother The UnderTaker. To take in every part of the pay-per-view and to soak up all that happened, click HERE to read KWF’s Royal Rumble.
Back at ringside the comms talk up what a night it was on Sunday and they tell that Jack Evans has earned a week off after that impressive X-Division Title victory. Regal: “What intrigues me there is the fact that Rey Mysterio lost his Title and later on he aligned himself with Alberto Del Rio. It’s fascinating Jim. The new LAX seem to have gathered on the back of feeling so many grievances toward our General Manager. I wonder if we’ll hear from them at all tonight?” With that, ♫music hits♫ «< click to play) and we’re treated to the entrance of Velvet Sky and the new Women’s Champion, Angelina Love. The Beautiful People milk the boos and they perform their ‘Let the pigeons loose’ entrance as they get into the ring. Velvet Sky has a paper bag in hand and Angelina gets on mic and says: “That’s it, come on, keep booing, boo louder and louder. We know you’re all jealous of how stunning we are.” The fans boo more as Velvet has a different take on things. She takes the mic: “Hey! She’s your new Women’s Champion! You bow to her beauty and you hang your heads in shame because each of you are so ugly! Look at you, your tired eyes, you filthy children and your marshmallow babies. I mean come on, do you women out there really think that your man would be with you if they had a chance at this?!” She poses seductively, as does Angelina. The crowd boo more as Velvet barks: “Well he doesn’t! He’s stuck with your fat ass!” Regal chuckles as JR says that The BP are crossing the line. Angelina gets back on mic and she says that she and Velvet aren’t going to let this ugly audience ruin their day. She says that she’s Women’s Champion once again and she then invites former Champ AJ Lee to the ring for a ‘paper-bagging ceremony’. The fans boo the idea as Angelina says that AJ deserves a paper-bagging because she made such an ugly Champion. ♫AJ’s music hits♫ «< click to play) and she steps out from under the rising tron. She looks furious as Angelina and Velvet sincerely ask her to come to the ring and take her bagging. Lee says that she’s not going anywhere near that ring because she’d catch the scent of that God-awful perfume that The BP are wearing. “What’s it called? Ferrari Red? As in those red f*BLEEP*k-me-boots that you got on Velvet? Or how about Christian Dior’s Pure Poison? Yeah that’s it, because that’s exactly what you are Angelina. I know what happened before the Chick Rumble began on Sunday. You two b*tches took Kaitlyn out. You threw me off my game and you took my Title. Well come SuperBrawl, I’m invoking my rematch clause.” The fans cheer as AJ stares down toward Angelina. She says that The Chickbusters and The Beautiful People have always hated one another, “and that’s why, when I defeat you to win back my Championship, I won’t only be doing it for me, but I’ll be doing it for Kaitlyn as well!” The fans cheer, but then The Beautiful People have the final word. They tell AJ that Kaitlyn’s out indefinitely and so it’s only a matter of time before AJ gets the paper bag treatment - and they promise that will happen at SuperBrawl where Angelina will successfully defend the Women’s Championship. There’s a huge stare-down between AJ on stage and The BP in the ring. The comms tell that this storied rivalry is heating up again and Regal says: “Lee and Love in a WrestleMania rematch from last year, plus an Elimination Chamber? I can’t wait for Starrcade already.”
We head backstage where Jeremy Borash is standing by to interview the odd couple of Panther and Brodus Clay. “Ladies and gentlemen, tag team action coming up in just a moment as Cody Rhodes and Christopher Daniels take on my guests at this time.” He introduces them and asks Panther why he is teaming with the Funkasaurus tonight. Panther says that Cody has been pestering him for a rematch ever since he bested Rhodes last week on Turmoil. “But let me tell you somethin’ JB! (in his best Hulk Hogan voice), I told Rhodes that it ain’t goin’ down like that brother! If you want another shot at the Black Cat, you’re gonna have to find yourself a tag partner and go up against me and the big bad Funkasaurus right here, Brodus Clay!” Brodus says nothing, but grins and just keeps randomly making “Sheee!” noises in the background, psyching himself up for the match. JB then asks Panther about the wellbeing of Kaitlyn, who was attacked by The Beautiful People at the Royal Rumble. Panther returns to his normal voice. “She’s pretty banged up, and the doc said he can’t predict when she’ll be back. She’s more upset about seeing Angelina Love taking AJ’s Women’s Title to be honest, but I’ve promised her that I’ll kick Cody and Daniels’ backsides tonight just to make her feel a little better. I mean that wasn’t ‘exactly’ what the doctor prescribed, but it couldn’t hurt, unless you’re Cody or Christopher, in which case it probably will.” JB ends by asking Panther why he’s picked Clay as his partner for tonight. “How could you not love this guy? With all the noises he makes. It’s brilliant. Slap a mustache on him and I’d be tempted to legally buy him off the KWF board for my own personal amusement.” Panther and Brodus head away for their entrance as JB hands us back to ringside.
Panther & Brodus Clay vs. Cody Rhodes & Christopher Daniels
The Black Cat and the Funkasaurus get a big cheer from the Canadian crowd, as opposed to the chorus of boos that greet Rhodes and Daniels. The match takes a while to begin as Panther and Brodus, along with Funkadactyls Cameron and Naomi, are having fun with the audience, trying to get them to boo their opponents as loud as possible. This irks Daniels especially, who clobbers Brodus from behind. The match has finally begun and The Fallen Angel is trying to cut the big man down. He tries to work the legs, but gets swatted away. He races back over, but gets caught, and Brodus lets out a loud “Sheeyah!” as he headbutts him down. “Mah bad!” he says and Clay is delighting the fans as he lifts Daniels up and bodyslams him, yelling “Sheee!” as he does. Regal: “Have you noticed how noisy he is in the ring? It’s jolly annoying.” JR: “I think it’s great, and so does Panther. It seems to have been the main reason he wanted to tag with him, and Panther’s in a better mood because of it. His girlfriend’s been banged up by The Beautiful People, but Brodus Clay seems to be cheering up the Black Cat.” As Brodus continues to make sounds as he works over Daniels, JR reminds us that Daniels’ normal partner, Kazarian, is still down and out after receiving a beatdown from Why So Serious in their Tag Title match at the Royal Rumble. JR: “Kazarian won’t be going anywhere near Why So Serious any time soon.” Regal: “Yes well, how ironic that Gambit and Joker cheat to defeat Kaz and Daniels and then on the following Turmoil we see Panther involved in a match against The Fallen Angel. And did you notice Panther and Gambit in the SuperBrawl commercial? Edge’s taking advantage of Panther and Gambit’s friendship I think.” JR: “Well actually William, it was Daniels who volunteered to be Cody Rhodes’ partner to get himself a piece of Panther. The two have battled a few times in the past within the X-Division, and in relation to Gambit, you’re right, Daniels probably wants to beat up Panther to take a final stab at the Cajun. It’s not really working though.”
Brodus tags in Panther, who continues to work over the Fallen Angel, and also introduces a variety of noises of his own. As he picks him up for a bodyslam he goes “Huyt!” He then tags Clay back in and they go to perform a double team move. Panther aims to lift Brodus up for a front suplex splash, but goes “Shyibut!” as he tries, and fails to lift him. The fans laugh as they then swap sides and Brodus shouts “Suplex baby!” as he lifts Panther, who actually shouts “Weeee!” as he goes up and down, landing on Daniels. Regal: “This is bloody ridiculous, they’re making a mockery out of this show.” JR: “Take that rod out your butt will you William, they’re enjoying themselves, and the fans can’t stop laughing.” Cody looks angry and frustrated in the far corner. The match goes on, and Daniels is able to work his way back into things as he takes the knee of Clay from under him. He finally grounds him and makes the tag to Cody, who also works the knee. Rhodes and Daniels work some quick tags and isolate Brodus, with Daniels hitting an acrobatic elbow in the corner and getting Two on the cover. He mocks Panther as he works over his tag partner, and then tags Cody back in, and he does the same. Rhodes comes off the middle rope and hits a Disaster Kick, pinning, but getting only Two as Brodus powers out. Panther smashes his hand on the turnbuckle to get a series of claps going from the fans. This helps as Rhodes goes back to Clay, but gets trapped in his arms, before getting taken over by a belly-to-belly suplex. The crowd go wild as Brodus is finally able to make his way to his corner and he hot-tags Panther. The Black Cat sends Rhodes against the ropes before shouting “Trip ya!” as he hits a drop toe hold. Rhodes gets up and Panther yells “Flip ya!” as he snapmares him over, and finally “Kick ya!” as he puts a huge boot right into the chest of Rhodes as he sits up. Panther then raises Cody onto his shoulders, and allows Brodus to tag in, before slinging Rhodes off and bringing him down with a PKO cutter. Brodus shouts “Should I get him?!” and the crowd scream “Yes!”, so he comes off the ropes and leaps in the air, with a “Sheewah!” and a Big Splash! Panther springs over to his opponents’ corner to counter any advance from Daniels as Brodus hooks Cody’s leg and gets the elementary Three.
Winners: Brodus Clay and Panther.
Daniels is clattered off the apron and proceeds to leave as soon as the match is over. ♫Clay’s music hits♫ «< click to play) and as Panther is about to make his exit. However, Brodus calls him back to join in the celebration dance. Panther is reluctant at first, but then Cameron hands Clay a microphone. He says: “Come on man, for Kaitlyn!” The fans cheer as Panther looks out to them. He gets back into the ring and takes the mic: “Well, Kaitlyn does love to see me dance, it always makes her smile, and laugh… a lot. But if we’re gonna do this, it’s gonna be on my terms.” Brodus nods, as Panther raises his arm to cue the sound guys. Brodus’ music stops, and is replaced by ‘Apache’ by The Sugarhill Gang. Panther and Brodus do the Apache ‘Jump on it’ dance as the fans cheer, and some join in themselves. Regal: “Jesus Christ. What has this business come to?” JR: “The fans love it William, and you know what? So do I! Panther and Brodus Clay are victorious, and I hope Kaitlyn is recuperating at home enjoying this as much as we are. This reminds me of an old Rikishi celebration dance along with Too Cool. But in today’s wrestling, it’s all about the Funkasaurus, Cameron, Naomi and the Black Cat Panther! Look at the crowd, they’re all having a great time.” The celebrations go on and on, despite the protests of Regal on commentary.
We cut backstage to Edge’s Skybox, where we see Gail Kim exit. She is passed in the hall by none other than Brock Lesnar, who storms in without knocking. “Edge! I heard you’re putting together an Elimination Chamber for SuperBrawl, winner gets a Title shot at Mania, well I want in!” Edge is taken aback by Lesnar’s forthright demand. “Err, Brock, like I said, there’s gonna be qualifiers starting next week. Nobody is going to be given a spot, they’ll each have to earn it. But honestly, as you’ve just had a KWF Title shot, and lost, I don’t think you’re in line to be in a qualifier.” Lesnar looks confused and angry: “You brought me in Edge, you signed me to a lucrative contract and gave me a Title shot in my first pay-per-view match, and now you’re telling me I gotta go to the back of the line? Brock Lesnar puts asses on seats, Brock Lesnar puts eyes on screens, and Brock Lesnar would be KWF World Champion right now if your boy Styles hadn’t gotten a lucky shot. If you don’t want me in the Elimination Chamber, then I’m sure your friends on the KWF Board would agree that that is simply ‘bad for business’.” Edge looks somewhat concerned after that last comment, and Brock can sense it. He continues his argument: “Come on Edge, put me in a qualifier next week. In fact put me against one of the guys who jumped me a few weeks back. I want revenge on that face painted nutcase Jeff Hardy.” Edge takes in Brock’s words and says “You know what, I actually quite like that idea. Brock Lesnar v Joker Hardy in Turmoil’s main event. But understand this Brock, this is your second chance. The Joker is a complete lunatic and if you happen to lose next week, then you’re out. You won’t get any more opportunities after that.” Brock: “Look. I underestimated Styles. I didn’t see that Pele coming at all and I get it now, I get that I have to be the Ultimate Fighter to get what I want from the KWF. Styles may have beaten me, but I’m taking all that anger and disappointment out on that freakin’ Joker next week. We’ll see just how much of a Joker he is once I’m done with him.” Lesnar chuckles as he pats Edge on the shoulder and says “Thanks” as he leaves. Edge looks on with a slightly concerned expression.
We come back to ringside where Maryse is making her entrance, and getting a good reception for once from her fellow French Canadians. However, another Canadian Chick gets a bigger cheer, her opponent for this evening, Natalya.
Maryse vs. Natalya
The match begins with Nattie on top, getting Maryse in a headlock takedown. JR reminds us that these two had a coming together in the Chick Rumble, with Ms Neidhart eliminating the French Mistress. He then goes on to discuss with Regal the revelation we have just witnessed, that Brock Lesnar will face Joker Hardy in the first qualifier for SuperBrawl’s Elimination Chamber match next week on Turmoil. Regal: “It’s a little suspicious don’t you think? Edge says Brock had gone to the back of the queue, but after a threat that the KWF Board may not approve, all of a sudden he books him in the first qualifier? Who’s really in charge of KWF Blogs these days?” JR: “That’s a big leap you’ve taken there William. But Edge’s job is to look out for what is best for business, and though I may not agree with his methods, Brock does bring the ratings up, and I can only imagine the kind of numbers Turmoil will do when Lesnar goes one-on-one with the man who led the attack against him just two weeks ago, Joker Hardy. And besides, considering 12 superstars will compete for six spots in the Chamber, I don’t see any harm at giving Brock Lesnar this chance.” The match at hand has gone back and forth, with Maryse using some questionable hair pulling tactics to get the advantage, and lose whatever support she had from the Quebec faithful. She flicks her hair to spite the fans, giving them dirty looks before bringing Nattie down with a neckbreaker and covering, but getting only Two. She begins to get frustrated, and hits a backbreaker, but gets Two again. She wants to end it now and sets up for the French Kiss DDT. However, Nattie reverses it and trips her opponent, before applying the Sharpshooter. The fans cheer the move as JR yells how great it is to see a Sharpshooter in Canada and it’s not long before Maryse is tapping furiously.
Winner, by way of Submission: Natalya.
The crowd cheer as ♫Nattie’s music hits♫ «< click to play) and she has her hand raised. JR comments on how impressive she was at the Rumble, getting down to the final four, and she’s picked up another win tonight. “Her daddy and uncle must be proud, Natalya representing the Hart clan in some style.”
We are with the General Manager once again in his Skybox, and he looks pleased at what he’s just seen. “We have the best Women’s Division in wrestling, it’s not even fair.” There’s a knock at the door, and Edge welcomes in the KWF World Heavyweight Champion, AJ Styles. There’s a little tension as the last time the two were face to face, Styles was accusing Edge of ‘changing’ and of favoring Brock Lesnar. However, Edge offers his hand and starts by congratulating AJ on his successful Title defense. AJ smiles and it seems that whatever hostility was there has since gone. “Thanks man, you said I could do it. I thought you were just blowin’ smoke up my ass to try and take away from the fact you gave Brock a free shot. But I had a little talk with Panther and he made me see why you did what you did. I understand, as GM, it’s business. I never wanted any preferential treatment when you got the gig, but I also didn’t want anyone else to get any. But after hearing what went down in here earlier, I think I get what’s goin’ on. Don’t worry about it man, in every business you get suits telling you what to do, but this is still your show, and I’m happy that at least Brock is being made to work for his rewards this time.” Edge: “Yeah, there’s a few things they don’t tell you when you sign up for the GM job, but like you say, this is still very much my show, and I still sign off every match, including the main event for WrestleMania. Now that was 100% my idea.” Styles: “Yeah, that one was a bit of a surprise. But, again, I appreciate you’re doing what’s best for business, and for those fans. It’ll be one hell of a challenge for me, but there have been a couple of main event Triple Threats at Mania and on the Grandest Stage of Them All, it’ll just make it that little bit extra special when I end WrestleMania holding this Title above my head.” Edge: “I like the confidence, but don’t forget, you will have another challenger for that Belt at SuperBrawl, but while I try and cook something up, I just wanted to say thanks for being relatively cool about the whole Brock thing, and who knows, you might have to face him again at Mania.” Styles nods. “It could happen, but if it does, I’ll just hit him with another Pele, that seemed to do the trick on Sunday.” He and Edge shake hands. Edge: “It was one hell of a fight, take care man. I’ll let you know on that SuperBrawl challenger.” Styles exits as Regal ponders who might be the new number one contender. Regal: “You never know, it might even be me.” JR: “I doubt that. But it’s good to see that AJ has come around to Edge’s way of thinking. Do what’s right for the company, even if it means treading on some toes. And it’s all for KWF’s loyal fanbase.” Regal: “If you say so Jim. I still wouldn’t trust Edge. I remember his history.”
After a commercial for the new Blu-Ray/DVD ‘The Best of KWF 2012’, we come back into the arena, where the lights go out. Screams are heard from the fans, right up until the point where we hear the inevitable *BONG!* The entrance is familiar, and soon enough we are in the presence of The UnderTaker. The Phenom makes his way slowly to the ring, before stepping in and getting on the mic without removing his hat or coat. He addresses The Absolute Lashley. “At the Royal Rumble, I gave you one last chance to fulfill your purpose, but you disobeyed my orders. I want you to come down to this ring right now so that I can address you face-to-face.” After some waiting, the lights darken again, and The Absolute Lashley does make his way to the ring. Lashley, without any hesitation, steps into the ring and stands square of The Deadman. Taker: “Lashley. At the Royal Rumble, I gave you specific orders to take out Sting, and you refused. You have never disobeyed me in this way before, you may have let me down, you may have disappointed me on several occasions, but you have never disobeyed me. You even climbed into a casket in Madison Square Garden simply because I told you to. So I can only assume that the Rumble was a one off, a lapse in judgment, so tonight I am going to give you an opportunity to redeem yourself. I have arranged for you to have a match, and you will prove to me how obedient you are by destroying your opponent.” Taker walks out of the ring, leaving Lashley to await his opponent. JR: “Destroy his opponent? Is this just an excuse for UnderTaker to watch some poor X-Division guy come out here and get flattened by his self-made monster?” We finally see who Lashley’s opponent is as music hits. ♫Well it’s the Big Show!♫ «< click to play). Regal: “Oh wow. That’s not an X-Division guy Jim!” JR: “Taker’s arranged for The Absolute Lashley to take on the Big Show!? Good God almighty, we’ve got an impromptu clash of titans here folks!”
The Absolute Lashley vs. Big Show
Lashley pounds Show with rights, but the big man just throws him into the corner. He fires him with shots to the gut and head, before shushing the crowd and open palm slapping The Absolute One across the chest. However, Lashley doesn’t react and grabs Show, throwing him into the corner, firing shots at him and doing more damage than Show did to him. He fires him into the opposite corner, before grabbing him on the rebound and hitting a side belly-to-belly suplex. JR: “My God! Did you see the strength?! The strength of this Beast!” As the match continues, Regal commends The UnderTaker, who is watching from the stage, on his decision to test Lashley’s obedience in this way, but JR isn’t so sure. “This may be a test, but one may see this as torture. The Phenom abducted Bobby Lashley in the first place and tortured him to within an inch of his life, just so he could mold him in his own image. He has already stated his belief that Lashley is not worthy of being his apprentice anymore, and I think he’s simply wanting to punish him by putting him in this grueling match. Taker says that this is a test, but what if it’s just for Taker’s own amusement?” Regal: “You’re so cynical Jim. As evil as The UnderTaker is, I don’t think he’s the type to get off on this. I’m buying what he says and I’m not going to question him. He’s The UnderTaker for God’s sake.”
Meanwhile, the match has swerved as Lashley attempted a bodyslam, but after holding Show for a second, he collapsed back under the weight and had to kick out of a pin. Show has used this to his advantage and is now trying to work down the Beast. He hits him with some more chops, and then sends him against the ropes before lifting him up to slam him down with a sidewalk slam. He covers again but gets only Two. He slides Lashley into the corner, before laying the boot in, trying to strangle him, but the referee’s count breaks it. Show smiles now and thinks he’s in control. He pulls his hand back, ready to hit the Knockout Punch, and as Lashley stands and gets up, Show strikes, but no! Lashley puts his hands out and stops the giant fist of Big Show, before pushing his arm down and lifting him up to hit a huge bodyslam! Lashley covers this time, but Show kicks out at the last split second. Lashley tries to stay on top with a series of clotheslines and shots, but Show is able to get back into the match as he reverses a clothesline attempt with a headbutt. Lashley is down and Show is shaking off the damage he’s sustained. He sees his chance and winds up for another attempt at the Knockout Punch, but Lashley sits up! The Absolute One sits up, just like his Master who continues watching from the stage. Big Show tries to continues with the WMD, but as Lashley gets up, he ducks. Show turns round and Lashley uses his almighty strength to lift him in the air and slam him down with a Sitdown Spinebuster! The arena practically shakes as Lashley covers and gets One, Two and Three!
Winner: The Absolute Lashley.
Lashley has won, and impressively at that. He doesn’t celebrate, as normal, but notably he also doesn’t bow to the UnderTaker as he has done previously, which is pointed out by JR. “Is this Lashley finally deciding to stand up for himself? Just like Sting told him to?” Regal: “I don’t think so, but if it is then he’s simply doing what Sting has told him to do, instead of what Taker has told him to do. He’s still just a big masked and muscular puppet.” JR: “Say that louder William, please.” Lashley just stares up at The UnderTaker, who stares back, not reacting in any way. The comms review multiple replays of Lashley’s endurance in this match and JR says: “If Star Wars is anything to go by, then The Absolute Lashley is Anakin Skywalker to The UnderTaker i.e. Emperor Palpatine. Is Lashley finding his own identity though?” Regal: “Again I’m not sure Jim, he didn’t exactly argue when Taker commanded him to wrestle this match. This is fascinating.”
We come to a video of two guys watching a football match. It’s the New Orleans Saints against the Carolina Panthers, and we soon see that the two guys are KWF superstars Panther and Gambit. They’re shouting at the screen after a play, and Gambit throws a yellow flag in the air. Panther: “No way man! That was clean!” Gambit: “You crazy homme? Foul on that play!” Panther puts his snacks down and stands up. “Oh yeah?!” Gambit does the same. “Yeah!” Panther: “You want to take this outside?” Gambit: “I wouldn’t want to embarrass you in your own street homme.” They continue to argue and the video moves on into shots of several KWF superstars in action. The voiceover comes in. “On the last stop on the Road to WrestleMania, there are chances for the top stars in the KWF to make their final push to be at the Greatest Show on Earth.” The action ends on AJ Styles, before coming back to Panther and Gambit, who have both kitted themselves out in full football uniforms of their favorite teams. They each get into a three-point stance before charging at one another. The video slams into the logo for KWF SuperBrawl, Live February 24th, only on KWF Blogs!
We come to our main event of the evening and we watch as Wade Barrett makes his entrance. JR points out that British Invasion Chick Layla isn’t with him and Regal tells that Barrett is out here as a warrior, a real leader of his faction: “At the Royal Rumble, by the time Wade got in the match, Styler and Drew McIntyre were already eliminated. But Barrett almost won the contest on his own. I spoke to Wade after Sunday and he said that he has the British Invasion as his back-up any time he wants, but now, more than ever, he’s confident in himself that he can get the job done alone.” JR: “Does that mean Wade’s trying to step away from his faction?” Regal: “On the contrary Jim. Wade’s decided to lead by example and pretty much winning the Rumble, not having Layla here tonight tells me that he feels he can defeat Cena by himself. It’s a bold move, but if he wins then he’s setting an example to his group. Then, as and when Wade becomes Champion, the rest of the British Invasion will advance in their careers, learning from their leader and winning themselves some Gold.” Barrett is booed as he gets into the ring. He is in no mood to respond to the fans and they cheer at the top of their lungs as we hear the ♫music of John Cena♫ «< click to play).
Wade Barrett vs. John Cena
The bell rings and there’s no respectful lock up here as Cena goes hard at Barrett laying into his gut with right hands and forcing him to the corner. He lays into him with kicks and proceeds to stomp a mud-hole in him, but Barrett reaches up and throws a thumb to the eye of the Doctor. JR: “Cena’s all fired up and I think we’ve witnessed the evolution of him here William. He had been a thug, a rapper who cared for no one or nothing but himself. But over the past few months Cena has shown respect for his peers, he’s shown humility – and now we’re seeing that he can still be a bad-ass competitor in the ring.” Regal: “You’re going to compare him to Stone Cold aren’t you?” JR: “So what if I am William? It’s great to see a man change for the better, but still be able to give his all for the fans and compete to the very highest level. I can’t wait to see how this match continues and I’m all for seeing Cena versus AJ Styles at WrestleMania.” Regal: “Cena, Styles and one other Jim. A small matter of a Chamber coming up at SuperBrawl, don’t forget.” We watch as Barrett lays into Cena with rights of his own and he sends him against the ropes. Cena comes back and Barrett attempts a big boot, but Cena ducks under and trips his opponent, trying to scurry over the back of him and apply an STFU, but Barrett has the wherewithal to make it to the ropes and he pulls himself under the bottom rope and out to ringside. Barrett stays there for the moment, regrouping as we go to commercials.
When we come back we watch the action back in the ring as Barrett lifts a knee up into Cena’s gut and then Axe-handle’s him over his back before getting him to the canvas and covering for Two. The comms review video replays of what happened during the commercial break and we see that Cena went after Barrett, but Wade used the ring apron and the barricade to his advantage and now Cena may be in trouble. Wade gets him to the corner and we expect a superplex, but Cena fights him off. He punches Barrett back to the canvas and when Wade gets up, he’s groggy and Cena leaps off the turnbuckle to land a leg-drop right on the back of Barrett’s head! The crowd go wild as Cena covers; One! Two! – but Barrett kicks out! JR: “What a match William.” Regal: “What a match indeed, but come on Wade, get back into this and win it now” Both superstars get up and Barrett slugs a right hand to the face of Cena. Cena comes back and fires a shot right back at Barrett. Back and forth they go as the fans chant ‘Yay!’ for Cena and ‘Boo!’ toward Barrett. Cena then hits Barrett so hard that he goes against the ropes, but Barrett attempts a clothesline as he comes back – but Cena ducks it, counters, lifts Barrett for a spin-out suplex and now The Doctor is back in charge. He stands over Barrett and holds his hands up toward the fans. He leans over and waves “you can’t see me!” in Barrett’s face and Cena goes against the ropes to try complete the Five Knuckle Shuffle – but wait, as he goes against the ropes, there’s a trip! Cena’s decked as an arm reaches in and it’s Konnan! Konnan has come down to ringside out of nowhere and he trips Cena. We watch as Cena gets up and turns toward him, but then he’s rushed from behind as Homicide and Hernandez are in the ring. They clobber Cena over his back and lay him over the middle rope. The referee sees that Wade Barrett isn’t being touched here and he calls for a Disqualification.
Winner by way of Disqualification: John Cena.
Rey Mysterio is in there and the bell continues to ring as Mysterio blasts Cena in the mush with a 6-1-9. The crowd boo like hell as Barrett exits the ring looking annoyed at the situation. Konnan gets in and kick-rolls Cena out of the ring and then, out on stage comes Ricardo Rodriguez. He has a huge grin on his face and he walks down to the ring. It seems that he’s about to introduce Alberto Del Rio as we go to the final commercial break of the night.
When we return we hear “Alberto Del Rio! Alberto Del Rio! Alberto Del Rio!” from Rodriguez and we see that Melina’s now in the ring and she along with Homicide, Hernandez, Konnan and Mysterio, all clap as Del Rio enters the squared circle. The fans boo as we see that Del Rio has a Mexican flag around his waist and Melina then strips him of it reveals the KWF Hardcore Championship. Mel hands the flag to Hernandez and he holds the flag high as Del Rio takes the mic off Rodriguez: “My name, my name is Alberto Del Rio – but you already know that.” The fans boo as Del Rio’s smug grin annoys JR. “This is ridiculous, LAX have ruined our main event!” Del Rio goes on: “I, I am your Hardcore Champion. And we, we are going to keep this Belt for a very long time.” Del Rio explains that the new LAX came together at the Royal Rumble, but really this cell has been in motion for quite some time. He reminds us of when Homicide and Hernandez cost Sin Cara the X-Division Title many months ago. But they weren’t costing Sin Cara, they were saving the Belt for Rey. “But then, then Edge decided that K-Dogg, wasn’t allowed to chaperone Rey in his Title defense this past Sunday at the Rumble. That was the final straw. That was when we all decided that we were finally going to put our foot down as a unit and we were going to take some Gold – some Gold that had no stipulations, Gold that could be stolen and kept by any means necessary. It was our destiny to unite and it was our destiny to raise this Hardcore Championship.” Del Rio hands the mic to Konnan who says that this all happened because of Edge: “Homicide and Hernandez didn’t get one look last year when you were trying to get the Tag Titles off the Dudleys. You chose to bring back a circus outfit and we formed; that was your fault! Rey Mysterio, the greatest Cruiserweight of all time, he was legitimately due a WrestleMania rematch for his X-Division Title and you didn’t give it to him. He had to wait, he had to compete. You said you were seeing if he was match-fit, but all the while you were hoping that Rey would get injured again and then you wouldn’t have to give him his rematch. Rey had to earn it back when you had no choice, but then at the Rumble you ban me from ringside. Rey loses his Title and we formed; that was your fault!” Konnan hands the microphone to Melina who addresses the GM through the camera: “I come back to the KWF after a long injury lay-off. I see that the Wolfpac no longer exist, b*tches backstage are no longer competitive and the glitz, the glamor and the spotlight of Women’s wrestling, it’s not on a Beth Phoenix, a Gail Kim or even a Natalya Neidhart. No, the Belt’s on little Miss AJ Lee and it bounces between her, Kaitlyn, The Beautiful People and Madison Rayne. You didn’t give me another chance after I lost to AJ at Sovereignty! I went to the back of the line, I’ve been there ever since and we formed; and that’s your fault!” Del Rio takes the mic back: “Do you see a pattern here Edge? Do you see how you have a ring full of the top athletes in this business and tonight, tonight you don’t even give us any time on the show – even though we hold a Title now?! You’re a disgrace as General Manager and you have overlooked us for the last time. This Title, this Title represents our unity. It represents how we have been mistreated, tossed aside and forgotten. No, together we will defend this Belt and there’s nothing that you can do about it Edge. We’re here, taking over your main event and now you have to take notice, take notice of me as the new Hardcore Champion and take notice of us, the Latin American eXchange!” The fans boo like hell as Hernandez raises Del Rio atop his shoulders. Homicide takes the flag and waves it toward the cameras before Melina then wraps it around her curvaceous waist. Ricardo Rodriguez takes the mic and continues saying Del Rio’s name as KWF’s Wednesday Night Turmoil fades out. “Alberto Del Rio! Alberto Del Rio! Alberto Del Rio! Alberto Del Rio! Alberto Del Rio! Alberto Del Rio! Alberto Del Rio! Alberto Del Rio! Alberto Del Rio!”